Friday, July 9, 2010

The Electromagnetic Air Bubble

We now return to KITT-FM, where it's all kittens, all the time. And now, broadcasting live from our studios in Purrbank, Cat-ifornia - heeeeeeere's your hostess, Mother Catresa!

Hi folks!

I promised that several new blog entries were forthcoming, and I am a woman of my word. Let's start with the funniest one, shall we?

Dharma - my grey-and-white-tuxedo cat - has had several appointments with our veterinarian lately, due to an intermittent loss of appetite. The first step was blood tests, which showed elevated calcium levels. Then, we had to do x-rays, to make sure there wasn't a tumor or other issue on the inside. And there wasn't, thank God.

Tee hee hee, Kellie - what's so funny about that? Nothing so far. It's what happened when my wonderful vet - Dr. Karen Hayworth, of Northview Animal Hospital in Pittsburgh's North Hills - came in to show me the x-ray photos and explain what I saw.

"This is the heart, and it looks normal," she said. "This is the liver, and that also looks normal."

We covered all of the organs from head to tail, from a side viewpoint. Then, she flipped to the next image, which showed a top view of Dharma's spine and trunk. It looked like a normal skeleton, except for a mysterious grey blob in the rib cage.

"And this," Dr Hayworth said, "Is a gas bubble."

I reacted incredulously.

"A FART?!?!?! On an x-ray?!?!" I said, laughing.

(Oh, I am so loving this, I thought. I feel, bubbling up inside me, a great, big, rip-roaringly funny ... blog entry!)

"No, it's more likely a burp," the vet said.

Whether it's the kind that escapes through the front or back door, though, doesn't matter. A flatus, of all things, showing up on an x-ray is pretty darn funny!

When I left the exam room chuckling, I shared the story about the flatulent x-ray with staff and customers in the waiting room. We all had a good laugh!

Now, the next time I need x-rays, I'll remember to skip the Diet Cokes, and refrain from eating beans and cauliflower for a few days. Especially if the doctor is a hottie.

Gaseously yours,

Mother Catresa
Patron Saint of Homeless Felines
(and the "smitten kitten")

Friday, July 2, 2010

Mother Catresa Goes A.W.O.L.

We, at long last, return to KITT-FM, where it's all kittens, all the time. And now, broadcasting live from our studios in Purrbank, Cat-ifornia - heeeeeeeere's your hostess, Mother Catresa!

Hi folks!

I must be in the dog ... er, cat house with readers. I haven't written since early May. What gives?

So sorry about my absence. I have been so swamped writing for a living at the newspaper, and caring for an army of kitties at home, that I have been negligent with writing on my blog. But, I am brimming with blog postings yet to be written, because we have so much to catch up on! Stay tuned during the next few weeks for several postings on the following topics:

= The seemingly miraculous adoption of adults Terry and Teddy during kitten season, and how it relates to serendipity in our personal lives.
= The 20-year anniversary of the famous kitten incident in my teen years that laid the foundation for becoming Mother Catresa later in life. (The anniversary, by the way, was a year ago. I know, I know. But the queen of procrastination never puts off until tomorrow what can be put off until next year.)
= The growth and development of my current litter of kittens and mom (including Chaz Bono; see previous post), and how they still haven't been adopted after three months. It's as disappointing as it sounds.
= Finally, the mysterious appearance of a ... er, gaseous bubble in my cat, Dharma's, x-rays. It's as funny as it sounds.

Until next time, I remain,

Mother Catresa
Patron Saint of Homeless Felines
(and the "smitten kitten")